COOKS!!
by Tiki Rocket
Summary: A collection of small stories that double as interesting/ easy recipes, involving some anime characters and terms.
1. TIKI COOKS!!

Author's Note: This is kind of a side series to a different series which   
I actually haven't gotten the second chapter done of. However, it uses   
the same characters, and the same household that will be used in chapter  
3, so yeah. ^_^* This is a real recipe, too (All the foods made in   
the "COOKS!" series are), so you can use it in your own kitchen! Make a  
"COOKS!" Cook book! It'll be fun!! Really!! Free of charge! All recipes  
copyright their respective owners.  
Disclaimer: Any characters that aren't mine belong to whoever owns them.  
I don't know the names of these people, but they know who they are.  
^_^^_^^_~  
  
TIKI COOKS!!  
Episode 1: Brownies  
by Tiki Rocket  
  
"No, you CAN'T help!" Tiki yelled as she shoved the door closed.  
Her older sister, LeaMarie, older brother, StormChaser, and younger   
sister, Lucky, were all on the other side pushing to get in.  
"But we wanna!"  
"Someone's gotta make sure you don't trash the kitchen again!"  
"I wanna see you make a mess!"  
Tiki sighed in frustration, pushed as hard as she could, and   
bolted the door. "You CAN'T help, I didn't mess it up THAT badly, and   
I WILL CLEAN THE MESS." She let out a quick, exhasperated breath, and   
said, "All right. Where's my cook book?"  
Before she did anything, though, she put on her apron; past bad   
experiences had taught her this lesson well. She grabbed her favorite   
green and black apron, then she dug through the shelves, pulling out a   
"Kid's Cooking" book, and opened it to the recipe everyone in the house-   
including their cousin Josh, who never appealed to anything- loved.   
"Disgustingly Rich Brownies! Okay, let's see, what first? Hmm,   
well, lets start with getting out all the necessary materials..."  
She went down the list, pulling things out of various cupboards   
and setting them on the kitchen table. "Sugar, flour, eggs, cocoa,   
vanilla extract, butter, salt, shortening, mixing bowl, and... Baking   
pan! There, now, to measure the ingredients..." she pulled out the   
measuring utensils, muttering them aloud as she went. With the powdered ingredients, she put them into the mixing bowl; She'd never felt any   
sense of order about mixing those together.  
"Okay, two cups of sugar..." She carefully measured out the   
sugar; a little too much was likely to send all of her family members   
spinning, and the Rockets didn't need any more hyperactivity than what   
they already had. Their guardians- Jessie, Cassidy, James, and Butch,   
four Team Rocket members who were currently on a VERY long break- would   
probably lock themselves in a room and refuse to come out until the   
sugar/caffeine had worn off or until the brownies were gone.  
She dumped the sugar in the bowl, along with the 1 1/4 cups of   
flour, and mixed it together. As soon as it was blended to her liking,   
she made a small crater in the center of the white powder and dumped in   
the 3/4 cup of baking cocoa and 1/4 teaspoon of salt, and whisked it all   
together into a weird brown mess.  
"All right, let's see... Heat 2 cubes (1 cup) of butter until   
melted. Easy enough!" She pulled out a measuring cup, crammed the two   
sticks of butter in, and microwaved it for a minute.  
"Uh oh," she muttered. "I forgot to preheat the oven... I still   
have time! How hot does it need to be?" She looked at the instructions,   
scanning over the directions. "Okay, 350 degrees farenheit... oh, and I   
still need to grease the fraggin' pan... Snot, I keep forgetting stuff   
like this and I'm gonna make a HUGE mess..."  
She greased the pan and looked back to her instructions. "Okay.   
Now what?"  
She saw the eggs. "Ooh, right, eggs. Four. Got it." The microwave   
beeped. "Shut up, I'll get to you in a minute." She tapped the eggs on the  
table, then cracked them open over the bowl, watching them slide from the  
peak of the cocoa/sugar/salt/flour mess down to the sides. then, she ran  
over to the microwave (narrowly missing hitting a chair) and got the   
butter. She returned to the bowl, pouring the butter in, watching it   
errode the mound of stuff, then grabbed the whisk.  
"Time to stir!" she said joyously; she began mixing at a speed that  
barely fell short of phenomenal.  
within a few minutes, the mixture was a dark brown color; needless   
to say, it looked a lot like mud.  
"Hmm... what'd I forget?" She thought for a minute, then looked back  
over the ingredients. When she saw it, she smacked her forehead and sighed.  
"Duh. The vanilla."  
She put in the vanilla extract, mixed a little more, and lifted the  
whisk. It was covered in sticky brown goo.  
"Hnh, easily fixed," she said, and tapped it- a little too hard- on  
the side of the bowl.  
She blinked and jumped back a little as brownie goo flew through the  
air. "Oops... James is NOT gonna be pleased with this..." James was   
usually the one who ran the kitchen. If he caught much of this mess, Tiki  
was gonna be in trouble...  
She picked up the corner of her apron, wiped off her face, grabbed  
a towel, and began to wipe off every possible surface that could've been   
hit.  
She heard the stove click just as she was throwing the towel into  
the "dirty towel" hamper, and cried "Yay! Perfect timing!" She quickly  
poured the contents of the bowl into the baking pan. "This smells like  
it's gonna be yummy..." she muttered to herself. She practically threw   
the pan into the oven, and set the timer.   
45 minutes. Forty five minutes of trying to amuse herself. Tiki  
was practically on the floor crying like a small, bored child when the   
dinger finally went off. She jumped to her feet, grabbed the oven mitts,  
pulled them on, yanked the oven door open and pulled out the steaming   
brownies.  
"Oh, yum!" She breathed, setting them on the open window sill and  
closing the oven. She sat there for a few minutes, watching as the cool  
air made the brownie surface crack and break.  
half an hour later, after carefully cutting the brownies, she   
unbolted the kitchen door. In tumbled two sisters, one brother, and a   
cousin who'd smelled the brownies and come out of his basement laboratory.  
"Is it ready?!" They all cried together.  
"Yup! Grab a napkin and I'll serve," Tiki said.  
Everyone sat around the kitchen, happily chewing the warm, soft  
brownies a la Tiki Rocket. 


	2. LEA MARIE COOKS!!

It was late. That was all that processed through LeaMarie's mind when she glanced at the clock. So why was she awake? She sighed irritably; her stomach   
was fairly howling in hunger. The howls were so loud it'd brought her out of a fantastic dream involving Matt (Digimon, season 2), some cool whip, and an awful lot   
of satin and silk sheets...  
Now, she stumbled around in the household kitchen, trying to find leftovers. "This is what I get for going to bed early and missing dinner..." she mumbled   
irritably. "I bet Tiki was especially hungry and went and ate everything, too..."  
"Not everything," Tiki said in a sleep-softened voice. "Why are you awake?"  
"My stomach hates me," Lea pouted.  
"Aw, honey..." Tiki gave her sister a comforting hug, or tried to. The pair practically fell asleep using each other as a pillow, but Lea's stomach gave a deafening   
roar which snapped both of them back into consciousness.  
"We could always shoot it."   
Lea glared at Tiki to the best of her ability. "How about we shoot the remainder of your brain? All it does is tell your mouth to babble stupidly."  
Tiki stuck her tongue out at Lea. "At least I've got some brains left that haven't been taken up entirely by BOYS!"  
Both girls were almost fully awake now, and throwing themselves into another stupid verbal war, when S.C. tumbled in. Literally. He rolled a few feet, then  
stopped, spread eagle on his back, snoring.  
His older sisters stepped over to him, more out of curiosity than concern.  
"Whaddaya think?" Lea asked.  
"I'd say, he heard you get up, then heard me get up, and he came down to investigate, fell asleep just as he got to the door, and crash landed his way into the  
kitchen."  
"Okay. SC! WAKE UP!"  
Tiki jumped back in shock, and SC's eyes flew open in surprise and he sat bolt upright.  
"Huh?! Wha's goin' on? Why'm I down here?"  
Lea looked at Tiki, and said, "Nix your theory, the stupid kid was sleep walking!"  
"Apparently..."  
SC sat still for a moment, gathering his bearings, then stated, "I'm hungry."  
"Me too."  
"Me three."  
"Tiki, the only reason you came down was to see what I was doing!"  
"Yeah, but now I'm hungry."  
"You are a black hole for food."  
"Not all food. I don't like fish."  
"You still eat Tuna. And sushi, too."  
"Not all sushi."  
"Oh shut up and think of something to eat."  
"We could make porkchops..."  
Lea sweatdropped at the idea. "It's SO not the right time for that."  
"Good point. We'd end up with flour all over the place."  
"We'd end up with flour all over the place no matter when we were cooking. I'm concerned about falling asleep on the hotplate."  
"Ohyeah..."  
SC piped up, "why not just make peanut butter and helly sandwiches?"  
"Helly?"  
"Yes, helly, it's a new word that I just made up because I'm the guardian of the air and all it's forces and I demand a rematch and some new shoes..." SC hit the   
floor again. Lea and Tiki sweatdropped.  
"Maybe we should send him to bed instead of feed him, then he can eat in the morning," Lea suggested.  
"How about we just leave him here on the floor, see if he remembers any of this in the morning?"  
"Well... He doesn't have his alarm down here, he'll be upset if he sleeps past, like, 7:30."  
"Are you kidding? He'll wake up anyway. It's an internal clock. He uses the alarm so he has something pleasant to listen to when he wakes up. Ever wonder  
why it's tuned to classical stations?"  
"Oh... That makes sense."  
And so, the girls left their brother on the floor to sleep and occaisionally utter strange phrases...  
"The CookBook of Simple Recipes For The Late Night Snacker," Tiki said, picking a book off of their shelf of cookbooks.  
"When'd we get that?"  
"I dunno. I only look every now and then."  
"Hm... What's it say?"  
"Well, we could make cocoa..."  
"...If we want to be hyped up and awake for hours... I'd rather not, I was really enjoying that dream..."  
"Oh? What was going on?"  
"It was another Matt dream."  
"Ooh, kinky..."  
"ANYWAY," Lea continued, blushing faintly and giving Tiki a pointed look, "Let's think of something to eat..."  
"I will destroy your evil powers with my Holy thumbtack and favorite minnow!" SC declared. Tiki and Lea looked at him, sweatdropping, glanced at each other,   
shook their heads, then returned their attention to the cook book.  
"My evil powers are none of his business," Tiki muttered, scanning over the recipes.  
"No kidding. Why does he care?" Lea added, flipping the page.  
Finally, both got annoyed. Lea slammed the book shut, and Tiki hurled it across the room, both sighing in annoyance, "This thing is useless!"  
"Okay," Tiki said. "what haven't we thought of?"  
"Well, I'm liking the sandwich idea... but I hate peanut butter!"  
"What about... uhm... Fried egg?"  
Lea considered the proposition, then said, "That sounds good..."  
Tiki had already grabbed the frying pan and two eggs out of the fridge. Lea, meanwhile, launched herself in the direction of the bread, bumping StormChaser in  
the process who imediately let out a yelp and cried, "Oh no! The greeting cards are gonna eat me!" Both sisters froze, looked at each other, and burst into giggles. This,  
from SC, elicited a declaration of "Don't make me drown you in dustbunnies! AHAHAHA! Ooh, air freshener..."  
The girls recovered, and Lea toasted the bread and applied a light layer of butter. Tiki fried the eggs without breaking the yolk, and cooked it just long enough to  
make them a little crispy on the edges.   
Lea poured tall glasses of milk for the two of them, and Tiki brought the sandwiches to the table.  
"This makes me think of that weekend when you got the Digimon movie," Tiki said through a mouthful of egg sandwich.  
"Yeah, I remember. That was fun!"  
"Yeah... good times, good times..."  
Lea snickered. "Baka."  
"Bakana ushi."  
"Bakana neko."  
"Bakana usagi."  
"Bakana... uh... I don't know any other words..."  
"You are a stupid squirrel! Ahahaha, I squirt milk between my toes at your foolish tail!"  
Tiki and Lea laughed, giving each other confused and concerned looks.  
"I think he's a very active dreamer," Tiki said.  
"Agreed. Wanna go test the warm water theory on him?"  
"Nah. It'd make a mess on the kitchen floor."  
"Not to mention what it'd do to those lovely lavender pyjamas...."  
"Leave my Lavender garb alone, you evil sandwich! Ha! Take that! I'll stab you to death with my evil wheelbarrow!"  
"TOO active of a dreamer. And apparently what we're saying is affecting his dreams..." Lea's eyes glowed with an evil light.  
"Hey Tiki?"  
"What?"  
"Wanna mess with his head?"  
"Yeah!"  
Both bent down on either side of his head, and took turns whispering words.  
"Pervert."  
"Wine makes you a perverted chameleon! I laugh at your-"  
"gluestick."  
"-Gluestick like head! You make me want to-"  
"Orgasm." Lea's eyes widened at Tiki, and covered her hands with her mouth trying not to laugh. Tiki was snickering just as hard, trying to supress any noises that   
might make her brother wake up.  
" -Scream with orgasmic delight!"  
The girls were rolling on the floor now. Their brother was no stranger to the word "Orgasm", needless to say; he used it as often as he could without getting in  
trouble, but it always sent his sisters flying into fits of laughter no matter what the context.  
At that moment, SC stood up, and sleep walked his way back to his room, mumbling the whole time. "Stupid candles, have to light the way... Why can't the moles   
do their job? Ooh, I smell Coca Cola!"  
Tiki and Lea managed to pull themselves off the floor, finally.  
"Time for bed, I suppose..." Tiki said.  
"Yeah."  
They walked up the stairs to their respective rooms, said good night, and closed the doors. 


End file.
